BARBURRITO Review - "A Savoury War Zone" - Glasgow's Best Burrito

The first call of duty on my burrito-laden quest was BARBURRITO, specifically the Queen Street branch, just opposite the Gallery of Modern Art. After some reconnaissance via their website, I discovered BARBURRITO holds the claim of being the UK's first "Burrito Bar", having opened the doors to its first restaurant in Manchester's Piccadilly Gardens, back in 2005. They also boast to be "ahead of the curve, burrito-wise" and crown themselves "revolutionaries" in the burrito field. Finally, the bold and audacious sentence; "we like to think we've perfected the art of burrito making". I will be the judge of that mi hermanos.

Presentation

The exterior of the restaurant is inviting: windows aplenty with stereotypical symbols of Mexico dangling from every crevice - exotic plants, exposed wood, bright colours. There is also a neon sign to greet us in Spanish: "Hola Glasgow!". Adorable. The interior was much the same story, with exposed wood and brick laden with plant life, all brightly lit up by decorative lights. Seating arrangements were in the forms of booths either side of a u-shaped walkway, with individual seating arrangements scattered around as you can see down below.

 Preparation

Approaching the counter, you can see and smell each of the fresh and appetising looking ingredients before you: a pile of fresh tortillas, the meats steaming away in their respective trays, each salsa patiently waiting to erupt onto your taste buds, and a triumphant pile of grated cheese waiting patiently at the end of the queue along with our old friend guacamole. Splendid

 However, this initial ecstasy was sadly, brief. The service was initiated by a grudged "hello there what would you like". Any ounce of enthusiasm must have been trudged into this opening statement, because as each sacred stage of constructing my "Loaded" Chicken Burrito was completed, it was done with an increasing level of exasperation and loathing, as if the tortilla had deeply offended the employee in some way. I felt myself flinch as each ingredient was aggressively propelled towards the defenceless circle of wheat - two servings of chicken, a right hook of rice and beans, and an uppercut of pico de gallo later, we arrived at the cheese and guacamole. "Would you like guacamole?" F*&k yes. I was excitedly anticipating a carefully executed linear path of guacamole. Alas, it was not to be. A lonesome, dismal dollop was thrown onto an obscure corner of my savoury war zone, and thus commenced the wrapping process. Two folds and a triumphant jiggle later, the fold was completed and I had my burrito. Foil wrapped and in a wooden dish, the exterior presentation was far superior to the prior mentioned interior crime scene. At last a redeeming factor.

 The first bite, although delectable, was sadly not a taster of what was to come; A fine balance of rice, beans, pico, chicken, and cheese. The guacamole was still hiding out somewhere in there though. The ingredients were fresh and flavoursome, however, a brief hot press would not have gone amiss to melt the cheese and address a somewhat lacking of foundation, as the tortilla became sodden and fell apart towards the end of the burrito. Two thirds of the way down or so the guacamole finally let its guard down. It came and went in one swift, awesome, yet brief, avocado filled sensation. The tortilla at this point must have been as disappointed as me, as it unravelled and fell into a Mexican mess. They really should reconsider the design of those napkins in order to avoid giving false promises - if I had eaten those final few bites with my hands, it might have looked more like a scene from the Walking Dead than a quiet spot of lunch. No burrito deserves to be pierced by the unforgiving cold of a fork or knife. Its a real shame that the preparation process is such a disservice to the ingredients and customers. Had the ingredients been carefully and evenly distributed in a linear way this calamity could have easily been avoided. It really is rather unfortunate. The uneven dispersal of ingredients is better represented by the two photos below. That first bite - so perfectly balanced - now seems so, so far away.

 In summary, my experience left me not longing for more, instead, longing for what could have been. The ingredients were fresh and eager to impress: from the soft welcoming tortilla all the way to the sturdy and bold guacamole, there was so much potential for a really quite special burrito. However, the exceptional individual talents on offer were let down by the poor preparation; like if a Real Madrid side was being managed by Pedro Caixinha. Overall, a nice quaint and authentic atmosphere was achieved in the restaurant, service was speedy, although not nearly enough TLC was given to the burrito, and as a result, I was left not angry, but sad and mournful. No burrito should have to endure the Sturm and Drang I was witness to today. In conclusion, BARBURRITO gets a 6/10 from me. Glasgow's Best Burrito lies not within these walls. The quest goes on. Vamos!

The Burrito Bandito