LAS IGUANAS Review - "Burning Burrito-based Blitz" - Glasgow's Best Burrito

Fear not, mi hermanos, for I have returned. Following a 2-week long siesta filled with procrastination and binge-watching Power, my never satisfied desire for burrito magnificence has once again surfaced, and it is time for my quest to continue. So, without further ado, lets get down to business! Vamos!

This time my call of duty resonated from Las Iguanas on West Nile Street. A very nicely presented and more wine and dine affair than Barburrito or Taco Mazama, Las Iguanas is home to a broad spectrum of South American cuisine made with British produce. Their food supposedly “pulses with its exotic 16^th Century roots” and provides “the warmth and welcome of South America”. They strive to bring a sliver of Latin America to the streets of Britain. Some death-or-glory, devil-may-care promises to make when yours truly is in town. You know what time it is. To the burrito!

Presentation

As you approach the restaurant, you are met by a vivid and impressive exterior: A large bright blue sign, above a multitude of windows, advertisements, plants, and authentic Latin American décor which sculpt a grand gateway into the cheery Latina bedlam within. “Eat Latin, drink Latin” we are instructed as we enter – I intend to. Inside, there are several different seating arrangements to choose from: a myriad of small tables, several more inviting looking sofa/bench arrangements, and an infrequent scattering of circular booths. No expense has been spared on décor – from the seats to the lights (again, very eccentric lighting solutions) to the flooring, to the bolts holding it all together, the place truly is handful of South America. Just in case that wasn’t enough, we have the usual suspects – cacti and exposed wood – to make sure we get the picture.

Preparation

As this is more of a sit-down arrangement and not an in and out job – to my horror - the preparation process is somewhat of an enigma. See we cannot the ingredients, the order of events, the process of folding and wrapping the burrito. Several sinister questions began to hurtle around my agitated head: Are they treating the ingredients with respect? Are they fresh? Are they giving care and attention to each inch of that tortilla? Is this even real life? Was 9/11 an inside job? As I waited and waited and waited, suspense steadily building, I saw my plate being placed onto the kitchen pass. From afar, there was promise: above par presentation, and an exterior which looked browned, hopefully indicating a hot press. Alas mi hermanos, this turned out to be a watershed moment.

The Burrito

A few moments later, a hefty plateful of chicken burrito, toppings, and side salad was deposited in front of me. A colourful display of golden-brown tortilla – hot press confirmed (JACKPOT) – and fresh, leafy salad, formed an alliance which created a very pleasant display. The whole exhibition was rounded off by a neat dish of salsa, guacamole, and sour cream. The build of the burrito appeared rigid; supported by the reinforced crust created by the press – as if it had been fired by the breath of angels. The spread of ingredients appeared to be even. Already it was shaping up to be a noble feast. From here however, the peak we had now reached, began to descend into a deep trough. As I picked up the first half to take a bite, I noticed a very slight but noticeable droop in the burritos structure. A mouthful of molten Mexicana scorched my mouth – the hot press as it turned out was more of a nuclear reactor, and what I expected to be warm, gooey glory, turned out to be a burning burrito-based blitz.

As I courageously made my way down, the ingredients were at least evenly spread. However, the force of the heat applied to the unfortunate thing had created a salsa, rice and bean-based sludge that no longer resembled any identifiable burrito filling. I managed to finish the first half without too much disarray and destruction, but the second half was a far different story. As I lifted one side off the plate, the other stayed firmly put. A recipe for a mess of epic proportions. I glanced at my cutlery. No. I am the Burrito Bandito. I don’t give in without a fight. Using every ounce of my burrito eating dexterity and finesse, I managed to get a few bites in without disaster, but despite my best efforts, I had to take a fork and knife, and begin cutting into my burrito. I felt each slice and stab in my own being. Burritos deserved to be gently held and caressed with great love and affection, not massacred like a roman gladiator in battle. One positive of this however, was that the burrito had now cooled to a temperature where I could analyse the quality and taste of the ingredients. And on both fronts, it passed the test. Flavoursome salsa, tender chicken, and perfectly prepared rice created a sweet yet spicy yet delectable burrito. The re-fried beans were delicious, and the wrap was of a high grade. There is potential here for an excellent burrito in the future. I needed every inch of my napkin to get rid of the evidence.

Conclusion

Las Iguanas creates an authentic, Latin American dining experience: the restaurant truly is a nice place to be, and makes you feel warm and embraced as soon as you enter. However, in terms of burritos, it is yet another case of what could have been. Fresh ingredients of a high grade providing a flavoursome and enjoyable burrito, let down by preparation. Had the wrap perhaps been more rigid and better executed, and the hot press provide slightly less heat than a collapsed sun, this burrito would have been thoroughly enjoyable. The price of my burrito was a fairly substantial £11.95, which were it not for the 25% student discount, would have been unreasonable. All things considered, Las Iguanas deserves a 6.5/10. A very enjoyable place for burrito banqueting, let down by build quality and a very hot press. The quest goes on. Vamos!

The Burrito Bandito